Not Sucking

I have been know to sport an inferiority complex. No, really? Yes, really. My type A personality may lend in part to that. My thought process "Oh, I just ran 4 miles, but other people run 18. Wow, I must suck." I know it's horrible, but hell, I know I'm not the only one out there who goes through similar thought processes. As you could imagine, venturing into the world of running with a mindset like that could kill a person dead in their tracks (or on their trail...) So the question: How have I overcome my self-deprecating brooding nature?

1.) Being Realistic. Being Patient.

I know you can't just leap up to double digit mileage overnight. I am not superwoman, I am not an Olympic athlete, hell - I'm not even a runner. :) I do, however, have a nothing but months and months of run-able days ahead of me. I have nothing but time to cover all manner of distances.

2.) My Kind of Running

When I started to run a about year ago my goal was a 5K and after I did it, I didn't do much else except indulge in holiday feasting. My inspiration was a seasoned runner and all I did was emulate his habits. I had never ran before so I didn't know how many different approaches there were! My running spree lasted about 3 months. I didn't do much research, I didn't log onto Runner's World religiously, and I didn't take walk breaks. I thought walk breaks were a sign of weakness - guess what, they're not. This time around I've learned what type of running method works for me. I want to feel good about my runs, and in order to do that I embrace the walk break. Again, I cannot sing the praises of Jeff Galloway enough. And another new addition to my running - MUSIC. Sometimes you'll even catch me dancing on the trail. Hell, why would I do this if it weren't at least a little bit fun?

3.) Celebrating all Accomplishments. (No Matter How Small)

I ran hills for the first time yesterday. They weren't huge hills, but they were more than I've ever done. I was nervous, on the way out to the trail all I kept thinking was "What if I can't do it?" Failure scares me. But, I found my resolve and was determined to attack those hills. In the end, I had a great run. I'm getting faster (apparently even on hills) and it feels damn good. I clocked one of my fastest miles, and even though I ended my run with a sock/shoe full of blood. (Still working on the finer points of toenail clipping) I was all smiles. I let myself be proud of my accomplishments. Running up and down some hills may not seem a point of pride for some, but for me, yesterday, it sure as hell was.

In the end I just tell myself, "You don't suck!" Even when I'm thinking that my mileage is measly compared to all of the marathoners that must be surrounding me on the trail; Even when I'm taking a walk break and what's sure to be a stellar triathlete passes me; Even when a high school cross country team whizzes past me and surely thinks, "HA! What is that girl doing running out here?!" -- Even when all those things happen - I mange to force myself to say "YOU DON'T SUCK." I am out here and that's enough- even for me.