Tuesday, February 15, 2011


When my mom was a young girl she walked into a parked car, the whole incident was so bad they had to call the ambulance. I, unfortunately, have inherited her grace (or lack thereof.) As a child I took dance: tap, jazz and ballet. I danced for 10 years, and I loved ballet. I loved the repetition in practice, the grace and beauty in the movements. I wanted to be a ballerina, until one day I overheard my dance teacher talking to my mother, she said "Rosalie is so dedicated to dance, but she doesn't quite possess the grace needed for a recommendation to a ballet studio." Not to mention I was a chubby curly-headed short thing. I went on to dance for a few more years after that incident, but I focused almost solely on my tap dancing. My lack of grace has always been self evident. I have never pretended to possess physical grace, I learned to just stick to what I'm good at.

But now it seems this lack of grace has presented itself in a different light. Ever heard the expression "grace under fire?" I am starting to learn that again, I am not graceful. I used to believe I was good working under a deadline. In college I pulled magnificent all-nighters, I would even wake up early to get work done. I could carry an 18 credit course load and still end up on the Dean's list. Well my friend, life isn't college. Now that I'm teaching 3 courses at the University and planning a wedding and writing a thesis and training for a half-marathon I find myself far less graceful than I ever was at the barre.

As I get older I'm staring to figure a few things out. For instance, I can pursue any activity that I want, even if I'm not that good at it. As a child I figured if my dance teacher didn't believe in my ballet ability then why should I? As a runner I wouldn't qualify myself as "good." I don't win races, I'm not fast, running doesn't come naturally to me - but I still do it. As I get older I find that I believe in myself more and more.

There is still the issue of grace, I find myself flailing as I try to juggle all of my responsibilities. Like my mother, I feel as though I might just end up walking into a parked car while trying to do it all. But in the end I will persevere. I am determined to do it all, and to do it well. And maybe with some luck, I'll even be able to pull it off with a little grace!


  1. I think that's the beauty of running..yes, we can work on our forms and improve them, but for the most part, it's just one foot in front of the other! At least, that's what I tell uncoordinated self!

  2. "For instance, I can pursue any activity that I want, even if I'm not that good at it."

    I love that line. There is nothing and no one to hold you back except yourself!

    Whenever I tell someone I took 14 years of ballet, they just laugh. I guess I'm not all that graceful either.